An Unusual Reason to Be Grateful

Seeing things from the other way around can make it easier to appreciate them

Photo by kevin laminto on Unsplash

Sometimes, I’m not sure if I write something and then I experience it or I experience something and then write about it. Being a full-time can be funny like that. Reality and cyberspace can blur into one.

For example, I had just finished writing this article about being grateful for all the things that could have happened but didn’t before I went to the gym. The gym was pretty uneventful but things got interesting when I went to pick up some groceries from my local shop.

As I was choosing which avocados I wanted to take home an elderly man collapsed to his knees next to me, clutching his walker for support.

Due to my first aid training, I paused, assessed the situation, and made sure I didn’t rush in too fast. Then after about 5 seconds or so, I knew the situation wasn’t going to escalate so I put down my things and asked if I could help.

A silent nod was all I needed.

I quickly locked his walker so he could use it to stand up without sliding from underneath him. I then held his arms for support.

It turns out that he has Parkinson’s disease and his left leg buckles underneath every so often. This was the third time it happened today.

I could sense his frustration growing as he willed his leg to work so I offered him more support to get him to his feet.

Once he was upright, he let out a big sigh of relief.

“At least I didn’t break anything this time.” He said with a subtle spring in his step.

I smiled. “Yeah, it can always be worse, can’t it?” I replied.

This backward way of thinking is what this article is all about. It’s about appreciating the little things, even if that’s in the face of suffering.

Here is where I started before I encountered the old man in the shop.

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Last December, my girlfriend was diagnosed with a chronic health condition that threatened her fertility. It was a big deal for us as we were preparing to have children so it put everything on hold.

Initially, I was numb. Then the first pangs of fear crept in. Ever since then, it’s been a mixed bag of hope, determination, despair, surrender, and finally, acceptance. 

It’s been a long nine months but somewhere in the middle I heard C.J. Langenhoven say:

“We need to be grateful for the many things that didn’t happen.” 

There are so many other possibilities that exist in the world, yet the one we’re experiencing right now is the only one that matters. However, it can always be worse.

The last nine months have taught me that much.

As bad as it got, my girlfriend is OK, her health is on the up, how energy levels have recovered, her mood has improved, and her ovaries are still producing eggs.

We could have been told that we would never have children. We could have been told that her condition was fatal. We could have been told a million and one other things that were much worse than the one she received. And there’s a lot to be grateful in that.

It’s a backward way of thinking but it works like a treat and I now use it in day-to-day life too.

When I’m struggling to write, for example, I remember how lucky I am to be a full-time writer and an audience who appreciates my work.

When I feel resistant to my morning practice, I remember how lucky I am to have a quiet space at home in which I can sit and meditate and the many teachers who have taught me.

When I don’t want to wash the dishes after friends have come over, I remember how lucky I am to eat dinner with loved ones.

And when my cat wants afternoon cuddles and disrupts my plans, I feel grateful that he chose me to hang out with.

This immediately shifts my mindset to a state of gratitude and as a result, my mood improves, I become more present, and I enjoy the little things.

So, remember: Things can always be 100x worse and that’s enough of a reason to feel grateful in life.

Everything else is just a bonus.